Life this year has been a challenge. I am constantly feeling overwhelmed. I am tired. Emotionally and Physically. Some days I just want to sleep all day. Yet in the midst of all this change, sorrow, and faith. I am still breathing. I am waking up every morning and doing what needs to get done, I am also so thankful for all the little things in my life. I am so glad that Caleb is gone now. I know that sounds sort of weird, like why would I be happy after the year I've had, with hospitals, deaths, and sadness to have my husband gone for 2 months. Well, I am the most confident in who I am right now. I know I wouldn't have been able to send my husband off to Boot Camp any other time in our marriage. I would have been too selfish. Now, I see life is fleeting. The moment only lasts a second and then the opportunity is gone. I want to live life with out regret and one of those things is encouraging my husband and those around me to take life while we've got it and do what we desire. I don't mean, run off and be nuts. But, live out your dreams. Plus, through all of this, my cousin Dannie moved to Boise. I love it. I love getting to know her. I love having a partner here while Caleb's gone. I love feeling myself grow. It's a good hard time in my life right now. Oh, and I did plant my small garden... just a few peppers, cucumber, and tomato! Oh, and here's a few videos for Nona.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
I wore a yellow dress a friend gave me today. I was reading a book on my back porch in a rare moment of quiet. I was really enjoying myself. Then I realized that I was being swarmed by little gnat type bugs. They were landing on me. I would swat them away, and then they would be back. I think they thought they had scored big-- I mean, the biggest yellow flower ever. So, I went inside and changed. I am bothered by enough things in life that I do not need to willingly let bugs crawl all over me. It is nice to be noticed and loved, but not by insects.