I did it again-- I got really frustrated and upset about something I could do nothing about. Why am I getting so mad? Why am I not living out of who I know I am- that is a confident, courageous, lovable, and MELLOW woman. I seem to have forgotten who I am somewhere along the last few months. I am so ready to blame everyone else and even blame my emotions for how I'm feeling. Yet, I don't sit down and think about my part in it-- or even if I don't have a part-- I don't sit down and calm down. Who cares if someone almost hit me last week. They didn't. Who cares if I drove to Caldwell yesterday to buy something and the person wasn't home due to issues I didn't know about. In the whole scheme of things, these little trivial things don't matter. As my mom use to tell me "don't make mountains out of mole hills". I don't want to be stuck here being that person anymore. I want to relax and be ok with other's crap, knowing who I am and being able to pray for them, rather than get so angry with them.
Do you ever feel like you know what to do and don't do it? It's so hard to be who God made me to be. Please pray for me as I continue on in my process.